Email

domesticanddamned@gmail.com

Sunday, January 31, 2010

But I am huge in Europe

I used a screen capture for this post

You know how in bad tv shows and movies someone always says "No one knows the band here but I am huge in Europe and Japan". No matter what you are watching; how lame the show is that will always get a laugh.

Well guess what my main blogs are huge in Europe and Japan. Not so much Mexico, but that's okay.
I do have a nice following outside of my city. No one in my city reads my stuff. Thank god. But, I am fairly well read in other areas of Canada. And I will tell you why.
It's not because of me at all. No one comes to my blog to read about me, they come to my blogs for my reviews and my weekly columns. Mostly to see if I posted a cute screen shot of Chris Sabin.

It's always cool to see the odd reader has bookmarked me from India or Japan. It's when the hits tracker lists them as reading something other then my weekly wrestling column or book reviews that makes my breath catch and my pulse race. But that is rare so I just go with the flow.
Some of my relationship posts have been getting a few bumps the last few weeks, but I think that is cause we are heading into Valentines Day and everyone is thinking about relationships in general.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

I know I said

I know I said on my main blog few days ago I am not really one for twitter, okay it was a rant who am I kidding, and I don't really use the one I have now for much other then the odd book giveaway and my weekly TNA review day update, but I have decided for the new blog The Year I Lived Off Of Ramen Noodles, to have a twitter for it.
I decided this because... well honestly I don't have a good reason at all.
But it is a different account for a different group of readers.
I am now about to confuse myself so let the games begin.

Friday, January 29, 2010

How's that working for you

I am trying to be less bitchy and negative on my blogs. As it was pointed out to me by my friend's husband while back that I have more rants of the week then I do days in the week.
Well, it's painful actually. I've never been the hearts and flowers type. I'm not comfortable in the role of happy go lucky. Just not me.
But, still would be nice to have readers for my other topics other then Chris Sabin's hair.

Oh and ps new blog here just a little something I am trying on for size

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Is this the new breed in blogs?

My buddy Patrick is a single dad. Sort of.
His aunt died last summer and he got custody of his cousin. He's finding it really difficult at 28 and suddenly "daddy".
I suggested to him that maybe he should do a blog, as it might generate some help. He refuses to. Said he doesn't have the knack for blogging.

What I have seen the daddy bloggers are on an up rise. So many guys are choosing to stay at home and raise the kids, or are single dads. The landscape wasn't like this even 6 years ago when I started on the internet.

It's cause you are a Singleton

I just could not figure it out. Why when I go around to other people's blogs and leave my footprints in the form of comments and show up on their hits trackers, why do I not get any love in return?
And then my friends husband said "Cause you are not a mommy. You don't have an online business really and you don't have kids."
I paused for a second. My friend laughing her husband continued. "Well, you said yourself that like 85% of the bloggers are stay at home moms or web designers or people trying to break into the cooking business. And the other 15% are either sex blogs or review blogs. So you got to think that you are in the low 15% blogging range. You are not getting the love as you put it cause you are in the wrong blogosphere. Become a mommy and then you will get the hits you want."

My friend was laughing for another few minutes at me. I had to agree, her husband was right. Not a mommy so not getting the kind of following that the other bloggers are.

But I also like to think of myself as the voice for non-mommy bloggers out there. The bitter cynical tribe of women who are just sick and tired and completely fed up with having to see diaper blogs every turn we make on the internet.
I am the voice of a generation of women.

My friend was still laughing at me twenty minutes later.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Why do you tell me this?

Posted this bit ago on my main blog.


"Oh well it's his loss"

Why is it all my male friends always say this to me when I tell them about my latest break up or that some guy never called back?
If I had an X-Division belt for all the times I have heard that....

Seriously now, is it just a knee jerk reaction from people to say this to family/friends? Or is there something I am just missing? Cause it's not just my gay male friends who say this to me, but my straight male friends too.

I was just having a chat with my buddy Patrick about a guy who contacted me from the dating site who said he'd call. Well he never did. Not too broken hearted over it either so whatever. But this then got us into a long chat on why a man would not let a woman know he's got a crush on her.

Patrick said on the topic "Maybe the guy with the crush is shy, or scared, or doesn't want to be rejected."
Well I throw at him "what if you know the dude is not shy?"
Patrick says "Then he's a total nerd and just doesn't know how to deal with women at all." Then he says "all men lack confidence at some point."

I replied with "what if the dude already knows he won't be rejected by me?"
Patrick says again "well then it's his loss."

I'm more confused then when I started.
So basically what you are saying to me is it's a loose -loose situation?

Monday, January 25, 2010

So I had this poll

I had a poll on my main blog last week asking "Would you date me?"
The choices were 1) You are funny so I know the conversation would rock. Yes
2) You are not pretty enough. NO
3) I'm not a wrestler so I would not keep your attention past coffee. No
4) Interview first, date later. Yes
5) This feels like a trick. Maybe
6) I thought you would never ask.


I got 3 hits total.
2 hits for #1 and 1hit for #4.

I happen to know Joshua voted for #1 cause he told me.
That means I had two total strangers admit they would indeed date me. In my life, that is the coolest news ever. One of those hits I believe is a long time reader of mine who has been following my wrestling posts.

The other hit is what has myself and my buddy Danny joking around and scratching our heads. We believe it's one member of my favourite tag team. We believe this cause it just fits right into things, and because the hit to the poll was in connection to a hit from the UK on my hits tracker. The wrestling company was doing a UK tour last week, and we know for a fact they read my main blog.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Circles

My code for going around the internet in circles looking at the same two or three sites cause I am not sure what I want to do is "Tripping the net for cargo lint."

I'm have a day of Tripping the net for cargo lint.

I'm bored. I have hit yet another wall with my novel and nothing seems to be inspiring me today. I decided to hit up iTunes Canada and maybe rent a movie, but everything I want to see is "buy only". I don't buy movies from iTunes for a few reasons, 1) they cost too much and 2) I don't have space on my mac for them.

It's pouring rain here so even if I had a place to head off to, it's just bad weather so stuck inside once again today. I'm really starting to get cabin fever. I can't wait for spring.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Bridget Jones's Diary... Advice p2


In the beginning of both the book and movie, one of the first thing Bridget Jones says is that she will not get involved with guys like her boss Daniel Cleaver. She will not because she knows what a slimball he is.

Then she does it anyway and gets hurt bad.

I vow not to follow Bridget's footsteps and to stop getting involved with men in my life who are basically Daniel Cleavers.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Are you were you should be?

I have been doing the Law of Attraction for awhile now. And there are days like today where I feel it's just not ever going to work.
I know, that for any kind of magick to work (Law of Attraction is magick just like any ritual or spell for love or money with a nicer name) you need to be able to keep the visualization going.
Days like today I just can't. My vibes have been low and nothing I have been able to do has lifted my mood.
The mini Sex and the City marathon I watched only deepened my pity party. I think it has to do alot with the season. Heading into Valentine's Day is never a good thing for me.
And I am unemployed. So not good.
Wait, one more bad mood reason, I have been trying to find a new place to live since July of last summer, but there is nothing I can afford.
So here's me single, broke, stuck in a rut. The path I follow has alot to do with things happening when they do for a reason. I just have not figured out what the reason for me being unable to get out of this mess is?
I have been doing reviews for other people's books and getting friendly encouraging emails from the press agents, but the only payment are the books for free.
I have seen reference to my blog posts showing up on TNA wrestling for a while, but still can not get an interview with Chris Sabin.
I get numerous hits on my profile on this one dating site with just as many guys asking to chat, but never any dates.
So if things are half way working, why aren't they totally? I have a May 1st deadline for my own novel, yet I am far from finished the first draft, the photographer I was in talks with bailed and I still can't find an editor. I need to complete all that before May 1st 2010 or I loose the backing for it.
So here's me asking are there any editors out there?

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

What's your weakness?

Okay, by now if you are just tuning into my blogs (I have so many I can't even keep count) you will be seeing a pattern in my taste for men.
And those of you who read my main blog, my wrestling blog, my vampire blog, my book blog, my cooking blog, and my pagan blog, you already know what I like. (I only gave links for two. But you can find links for all on the side bar) Wrestlers.

Yeah I am not normal.

Most women dig rock stars or movie stars, but you know I have done that more then I want to count with the men in this city. I like them little more on the ... X-Division side.
Did I happen to mention that Joshua my cyber f**k buddy is an indie wrestler? No?
Hey folks guess what, my cyber f**k buddy Joshua is a wrestler for the indie companies.

He's got great arms.

I'm not even sure where I am going with this confession. Maybe nowhere. But I want to know, what is your weakness ?
Everyone has one.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Opps I did him again

There is this guy Joshua.
He has a weird effect on me. I have a blast when I talk to him. He's cute, funny, sexy even. And I end up doing things with him I would never do with any other guy.

We're friends. We have the same twisted sense of humour. And he keeps popping up on the dating sites I join.
I am completely free when I am with him.

Oh did I mention I have never met him outside of the computer? Yeah, he's my cyber f**k buddy.
Sad, pathetic and oh so yummy. This has been going on for a very long time. He's also my back up when things get totally crazy in real life, or some sleazy old guy/thirteen year old starts to cyberstalk me on Myspace or something. I just point to his profile and claim him as mine. I've had to do that more then once in real life too cause of one creepy Lesbian who works at the Blockbuster down the street.

Tonight, while we were doing what we do best, ripping apart the rest of the world, I brought up my last posting topic Which then got into the question of what we have being an emotional affair?

He wasn't sure. I'm not sure. As I said, this has been going on for a while, and we're both fairly attached to each other on one level. So why not turn it into something real?
Well, he lives in the U.S. and I live in Canada. (yes I have a thing for American men okay deal) the other AND/BUT in the situation is that we're not compatible.

I know I know then how can I be so damned free with him? You got me?
I'm looking for a long term relationship, and he's well, not. There is a bit of an age difference here too, he's 8 years younger. Okay so I'm a cyber-cougar-slut. Deal.
I see myself heading for a massive broken heart, but not really.
Confused yes very much.

It's great cause he takes the edge off of being alone, but it's bad because I'm always shocked at myself afterward. I've never considered myself anything but a Prude. So what is it about the very thought of this guy, the very sound of his voice that makes me... act like ... this?

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Are we faking it

Season two episode 28 of Sex and the City Was it Good For You? the question of the week is "how do you know you're good in bed?"
The character of Charlotte has a guy fall asleep on her while they are having sex, and Carrie becomes the replacement vice for a guy with addictions.
In episode 16 They Shoot Single People Don't They? (also season two) the question of the week is "is it better to fake it then be alone?" Where Miranda has to fake it more then once with the same guy.

I was reading an online article about men having to fake it in bed. I have to be honest, I did not think it was physically possible for a man to fake it.
I know guys fake the rest of the relationship all the time, but in bed?

And before you get all into "well women fake it all the time" it's true that alot of women have faked it, many of us do not.
I have never. No it's not always that good, I just am rude and will tell the guy it's not working. I see no reason to fake it.
If you fake it once, and the relationship extends from a one night stand to a proper relationship or even just f**k buddies, then you are more then likely having to fake it every time.

That is false advertising.

More people seem to meet online now then they do in real life. Many would consider the start of that kind of relationship faking it. If you have a cyber f**k buddy, is that a fake relationship or a really safe sex one?
That would bring up the question of is sex ever safe? Emotions are emotions wither they are expressed over the internet or in physical form.

This brings me right back to the original topic, Are we faking it?

I sent out a few messages to my single male friends about this topic, but honestly none of them have had the balls to open up with me.
Trust me when I say, I'm sure I will be back to this topic at some point.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

You Brought Me a Pet Werewolf...

Originally posted on my main blog on Jan 15th 2010

I used a screen capture for this post.


He's cute can I keep him?

Yes, if you read this weeks edition of "My Thoughts on TNA Impact" (Jan 14th 2010 episode) then you saw that capture and the screen shot of Chris Sabin. And if you are a regular reader of my blog then you know I have been nagging him (lovingly, sweetly, with just enough molasses for it to be too thick to pour) for almost a year now about his hair.

I have tried twice to stop, but SIR I HAVE AN ADDICTION (there is a really obvious dirty joke there but even I am too bored to go for it)

I have said time and time again, that Mr. Sabin is pretty much perfect. Fabulous in the ring, great to look at, wicked sense of humour, and hair that makes my teeth ache cause it's just .... grubby.

But look at this screen shot, even I have to admit he looks hot with that shaggy mess and lost in the woods beard thingie he's got happening. Damn it.
Normally I compare him to a monkey cause of his ability in the ring to climb and jump around without any issues (Did you all see him in that Ultimate X match back on Oct 22 2009?) but the werewolf image is more then clear. There's just something primal about him here. You can't tell me there isn't.
You so can not tell me that you don't think The Howling, or Company of Wolves or well the most obvious Wolf (James Spader's werewolf in that one not Jack Nicholson's ) and ya know that really old and really bad exploitation film from the 1970's Werewolves on Wheels when you look at this shot.

I don't know what he's trying to say with that look in his eyes ( come hither, I want to slice you with a chainsaw and use your intestines for hair gel ) but that is one big bad wolf I wouldn't mind running into in the dark of night.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

I can't help it.

I used a screen capture for this post.

I have to say, that when I was posting this on my Andrew and the Aluminumsidings blog this morning, I was crying. I know crazy right, crying for a man I have never met before. But, honestly, Alex Shelley is the reason I became a fan of TNA.


The first episode of TNA Impact back in the fall of 2005 opened with a three way match between Alex Shelley, Chris Sabin and Petey Williams. I saw him come out to the ring and was like "oh god. Why is he familiar?"
To this day, I can not tell you how or why I recognized him as I know I never saw him on television before that.
I have called him Dionysus in human form many times on my blogs, and I am not just saying that because he's so beautiful. I'm saying that because he's so talented too. I have watched wrestling for over 31 years (I'll be 36 this spring) and never have I seen a wrestler with so much pure talent then Alex Shelley. There have been guys who have been good or nice to look at or both, but none, none of them have had this quality that Mr. Shelley has. He's spellbinding, just bewitching to watch, to listen to.

No one wants to hear that their heroes are hurt. No one wants to believe that someone they respect and admire could be just as human as them.
In the same regard, women have a tendency to romanticize their heroes; building them up to a status that no average man can meet, while at the same time, secretly wanting them to be average.

Follow me.

For the last while on my main blog, I have been talking about Mr. Shelley and Mr. Sabin in a way of pointing out they are not flawless. I know the readers of my main blog have gotten the humour of it, as I am sure both Mr. Shelley and Mr. Sabin have gotten the jokes. (I rip myself apart too alot. ) My main blog is part reality ,part fan mail , but all lustful honesty.

I know I have said in the past I don' t think I could be grown up enough to handle talking to Alex Shelley, that I am not professional enough a reporter to interview him. But if the chance were ever given, you know I would take it. Screamingly jump at the chance.
He's what wrestling is about. Alex Shelley is the real icon for pure wrestling.

Oh God! Is He okay?

Posted this few hours ago on my main blog

I used a screen capture for this post.


If you have been reading this blog much over the last few years, you know I don't like spoilers. I don't read other fan sites, I stay away from the official Myspaces and Facebooks and avoid Wikipedia at all costs.
I do however read Injury reports on TNA Revolution.com

With that said, they have just reported that Alex Shelley suffered a neck and back injury. Damage to the disks in his neck. (according to TNA Revolution.com it is bulging disks and herniated neck.)


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Dating 101 -Tips from the Non Dating Guru... the posting series

I started another "misadventures" in dating series on my main blog this week. I had been blogging last summer about the guys I was meeting on a dating site. I thought my dating days were over for the season, but a few rare messages are still coming in from a few odd balls. Here is the two latest posts from my main blog.
Last summer, I called the dating posts "Are there any Single Straight Men left on the Planet?" this one I am calling Dating 101 Tips from the Non Dating Guru.


Humour me.

The universe is teasing me. For those of you who read my relationship posts, you will remember my series I did over the summer when I was actually dating again. "Are there any single straight men left on the planet?". When I was talking about the Austin Aries Look A Like (nope never did find a better tagline for him.)
Well, I just got messaged by a guy who looks like another wrestler. This dude is a dead ringer for Sonjay Dutt. So weird man, so weird. Does this mean the universe will send me an Alex Shelley look alike soon? Here's hoping.
Anyway, the Sonjay look alike, seems a little hyper, as he kind of skipped the intro part and started in with a to do list for our first date. Um excuse me? I did not even agree to actually go out with you? Top it all off he owns a club/bar in town. Last thing I want is another bar star. I have been there, done that 3 times in the past. Yeah, 3 different times. (the creep who cheated on me with my cousin was a bar star 24/7. The dude after him was a Bartender. And the dude after that was Trainwreck the dj/musician.)
Seriously, Any guys at all who are not actors or djs or musicians in this city? Why can't I meet a nice quiet photographer or painter or even an English teacher or something that does not have the guy in a bar all the time?



Continue to humour me.

Well it would seem that Howie D. is the Backstreet Boy of choice for guys on dating sites.
That is, the celebrity photo they all seem to want to use instead of showing their own photos. Hmm.
I find that insulting really. All these guys talk about how they want an honest woman with no head games and then they pull dren like that.
That tells me you are afraid to be on a dating site. If you are afraid to be seen by someone that might know you then you most likely should not be on a dating site. And 80% of the "Howies" are looking for "other relationship". I can not tell you how many guys have messaged me in the course of the last 8 months that I have been on this one dating site, who have made comments about wanting a discreet encounter.
First off, I'm listed as looking for long term with marriage in mind, and second there is nothing discreet about me.
I've confessed my desire for Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin publicly on here more then a few hundred times, so you know not the most silent when it comes to stuff.
This is not the first time either on this site that some bucket of dren has used a celebrity photo. I have seen photos of the actor Robert Buckley from the tv show Lipstick Jungle used, singer Clint Black, and remember I told you last summer someone actually used a cropped photo of Chris Sabin. Really guys. That one still makes me giggle.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Will the drama ever stop?

I just was chatting with the woman who does the wwe reviews on BlindTag.com
I got us nominated for a sports blog award. I'm not stupid, I know that unless we amp it up and get some interviews, we will not win this year. But it will help to draw attention to the blog and get some new readers.
Her issue, she saw my other blog where I posted that Blindtag.com was MY blog.
Well, yeah it is. I started it, I came up with the title, I got the people together to work on it. The blog is under my account. So yes, it is my blog. Oh sorry, my MOM's blog, as she owns the domain.
So what is the issue? Well, then she was like "if it's yours then all it's on you. I will just do my normal. "
That's all I expected from her. 3 posts a week. that was the agreement.
Of course it's all on me. It's my blog. It's my job to find a way to do a banner and header at some point without crossing copyright issues of wrestlers. It's my job to promote it. It's my job to try and find someone in the business to interview.
To say it's on anyone else is ludicrous. It's my neck on the line.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

I know what I want

I worked in television for 3 years in the early 1990's. It was fun, stressful, brutal, and in the end not for me.

I have been working online for the last 6 years off and on for online magazines/newspapers. Just trying to find my voice.

I blog because I love it.

I write novels and poetry because if I did not I would stop breathing.

My hobbies include movies, books, art, coffee, tarots, studying the occult.
My passions include wrestling and vampires.

I have more blogs and websites then I can count, one for every part of my interests. I am scatterbrained all the time because everything is so stretched out. But as I posted before, I did it that way cause the readers did not like the other topics. Only, it's really taking it's toll on me. I have been asking the universe for awhile what my real purpose on this planet is. I have gotten no real reply other then writing.

This morning I asked myself why am I taking the whole wrestling thing this week so damned personal? I'm not a wrestler, I am not part of the wrestling business. This sprang to thinking about why I got into television nearly 20 years ago to begin with. The answer was to become a wrestling commentator. I am not a sports writer. Never got into any other sports. Just wrestling.

I have to scale down my interests for awhile and focus on the really important things. My answer was staring me in the face the whole time. I want to be involved with the wrestling media. Just the fact I got the domain name for Blindtag.com said something I was not seeing before. I never bothered to do that for my horror site, or my vampire site, or my pagan site.
They are strong interests of mine so why did I never hold them on the same level?

My focus now is with my novel and Blindtag.com.

Friday, January 8, 2010

I had this bad vibe

I had a bad feeling on Monday. All having to do with the big 3 hour special for TNA Impact.
Here it is Friday, still have not gotten to see the show, and hearing all sorts of bad stuff from other fan sites.

Biggest thing I am hearing that is upsetting me is the injury reports. There's more then just one coming in.

You are wondering what has a wrestling tv show have to do with me? Well, much of nothing really. I have a weekly review I like doing on my main blog and on my wrestling blog http://blindtag.com.
I also have a new column so to speak that I started on my Gonzo Journalism blog where I talk about wrestling.
The difference, is that the one on the gonzo blog is rougher. I don't censor myself at all and I talk about both the major companies.

Again, you are thinking "yeah so?"
Well, the fact I had to wait (and am still at this point) for iTunes Canada or Spike Tv official website to post the replay, by the time I see it, the review will be pointless. Everyone who reads my columns will have seen it and read spoilers from other fan sites.

I don' t like waiting. I am no good at it.

But, writing about wrestling, I would love to turn that into a full time job.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Let's all talk about my boobs.

Picture it, March 2009 and I am chatting with my buddy Cole Cash. The topic, how to get a famous wrestler to grant me an interview for my wrestling blog.


The conversation went like this:

Me - I want to get an interview with Chris Sabin. How do I do that?

Cole - Send him a photo of your boobs.

Me-Um..right. I am trying to get his attention not scare the crap out of him. Seriously now.

Cole-I like your boobs. You have my attention.

Me-You're not an international wrestling superstar. Besides what part of I want to interview him are you not understanding. Interview. Meaning chat. So how do I get his attention?

Cole-I say flirt with him.

Me- Lovely, my career as a Journalist is over before it has really started.

Cole- Try the fan site on myspace or something.

Me- *deep sigh* I did. I complimented him on his drop kick.

Cole- *mad fit of laughter* Think about how much fan praise he gets every day from people. Take a more personal approach.

Me- What I should insult his hair?

Cole- *more laughter* Sure. Insult Chris Sabin's hair, and send me a photo of your boobs.


Well, I did. The ranting about his hair I mean.

I wrote what would be the post to put my little blog on the radar of Chris Sabin fans worldwide. Then, last summer I posted this conversation on Aug 4th 2009. On Aug 27th 2009 an episode of TNA Impact aired with MotorCityMachine Guns! doing a promo where Chris Sabin was talking to the boobs of the female journalist.
I was jumping for joy. My blog had inspired someone over at TNA. Maybe even Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley themselves.

Then yesterday I had this conversation with my mom.


Mom: you didn't actually send him a photo of your boobs did you?

Me: No. What are you dumb; stupid?

Mom: Cause that would be .....

Me: The kind of thing Setla would do?

Mom: true she would do something stupid like that. Why would you even consider something like that?

Me: I didn't. I was having a conversation with Cash.

Mom: Oh. Why would he tell you to do something like that?

Me: Cause it's Cash. *shrug*

Mom: Why did you say on your blog that you would?

Me: Huh? What? Where?

Mom: You said if he asked for a picture you would send one. In your comments with the interview questions.

Me: Oh, the christmas post. Totally safe. There is no way in hell Chris Sabin will ever ask for a photo of my boobs.

Mom: *laughing so loud everyone in the bakery department of the grocery turned to stare* Oh don't be silly girl. No one would. No one wants to see that.


That caused a bit of a stir when I posted it. I know my friend who replied to the post on my main blog was trying to be supportive, but it didn't sound it.
It sounded like she was telling me I didn't matter. Just like my mom made me feel like I didn't matter.
Me posting the conversation with my mom was not about the moral issue that my friend seemed to think it was when she commented telling me I should not do something like send a celebrity a naked photo. My posting was about the fact my mom belittled me once again in public.
My friend was going on about how all men just think of women as sex objects and how that degrades us.

That's just not true. And before you point to the top half of the post, Cash is a rareness in my life. He's a guy I turn to when I want to have someone flirt with me. My friendship with him is only on the internet and it's about the flirting.

Most men, don't even know I exist. I'm always the buddy never the sex object.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Law of return 2010

I did a post few months back about the idea of the law of return. I talked about how I would love to get letters specially love letters.
So I started a series of posts called "Unopened Letters to An Imaginary Husband". on my main blog back in Nov.
Sort of like a gratitude journal. Just poem-ish letters on my blog.

I'm not giving up hope, I still believe I'll get some in return. Here's parts 1-6


My Dearest Love:

Thank you for taking out the trash today. It was sweet of you to remember without being told five times.
Thank you for picking up the dirty socks from the bathroom floor before someone slipped on them falling.
Thank you for remembering to set the vcr to tape my soap opera while I was shopping with mom.
Thank you for not letting the dishes pile up over the weekend while I was on the business trip.

My sweet man, what would I have done without you making me soup the time I was sick with the flu, even if it was from a can.
What would I have done if you hadn't been stubborn and gotten the leather sofa when your brother's kids spilled grape juice on it. The stain would never have come out of any other material.
How many blankets would I need to stay warm at night if you were not there beside me with your body heat.

How can I repay you for your comfort and security you have given me over the years.
For all the day to day things you have brought to my life, my sweet man, my dearest love, my husband, my friend thank you.

-Love always, Ardeth Blood


My Dearest Love:

I miss hearing you breathe beside me in the dark, even when you snore
I miss the feel of your arms around me, even when you elbow me in the ribs as you roll over
I miss the late night kiss, even after you had garlic for dinner
I miss the way your hair falls into your eyes as you sleep, and the way it sticks off in all directions in the morning.

I dream of your touch when you're not here
I forget nothing of your scent as it lingers in the pillowcase
I remember your breath on my shoulder as you kiss me
I long for your return, for when our time apart will once again be over
I long for you and all you are

-Love Always Ardeth Blood


My Dearest Love:

I remember the first time I saw you at the bar, dancing like a stiff monkey
The small stain on your shirt from the nachos you had been eating
I remember the first time I heard you speak, as you nodded and winked at my friend first
Your smile was nearly perfect
The next time I spotted you it was in line at a coffee shop, your skin gleaming in the shop's light,
Your eyes hiding behind thin glasses
I remember how you spilled your latte on yourself as you dropped your wallet
You are the cutest when you are embarrassed

For all the times you have made me laugh, on purpose or not,
I have a hundred kisses to return to you
For all the times you entertained me, and those around us
I have a hundred hugs to return to you
For the happiness you give me I have only my heart to return to you

Love Always Ardeth Blood


My Dearest Love:

The coffee steaming beside your hand as you read the morning paper every Sunday
Reminds me of a black and white photo we once saw at the art gallery.
Jazz music on the radio as you moved around the kitchen, your favourite shirt stained with paint always made me think of my favourite poem.

You've always been living art to me,
A gift from Dionysus, or Aphrodite.
A blessing even when we fight.

You touched my soul with your smile
Caressed my flesh with your eyes, with just one soft look,
I hope you understand what you do to me every time you wink and laugh
at all the silly things I say.

My desire for you grows hotter every day.

Love always Ardeth Blood


My Dearest Love:

I know what you are feeling, what you are trying to hide when you look at me, your eyes wide, your lips in a sly smile,
You are a hopeless a romantic as I am, though you pretend not to be.
I know you are counting the hours till you can call me up, to ask me how my day has been, but until you can, you settle for updates on my blog, following me silently.
I know what you are wanting from me, when you dream at night of my bed, as you stare at the ceiling in your own.
I know you wish to give me the world, but are afraid to try.

You always knew what to say to make me feel even better in my day, to make me smile despite myself, to make me think of nothing but your lips, your voice as it slips softly around me,
You're poetry in motion, a desert flower blooming alone, your strength scares me, your beauty too much for me at times,
I wait by the phone desperate to hear your voice, hushed and polite as you fill me in on your night.
My strange friend, my secret heart, take a deep breath with me and admit what we both know.
Who needs the world when I've got you.

Love Always Ardeth Blood


My Dearest Love

I'm grateful for the flowers you always bring me even for no reason
I'm grateful for the ability to communicate with you without words
I'm grateful for the time you were willing to watch the that dvd with me even though we'd seen it a hundred times already
I'm grateful for the night you talked me into driving with you in the rain

I'm happy for our time together even when we do nothing but argue over the laundry
I'm happy for the way the light glows off your skin when we walk in the snow
I'm happy for the sound of your voice when you sing off key
I'm happy for fact you are in my life.

Love Always Ardeth Blood

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

What's it going to take?

Staying up beat and positive is the hardest thing on the planet. I have been trying to work the Law of Attraction to help bring the right business partners into my life cause, so far my ability to find the right people has sucked and I keep getting screwed over business wise.
But the people in my life (family and friends) are the biggest downers ever. It's like a giant black hole talking to mom.
I'm in talks with this photographer right now to work on the cover for the book, and I can't get a straight answer out of the guy. It's driving me nuts. But he's also the cheapest in town.
I am tired of people around me looking at my writing as a hobby. Its not. It never has been.

Blog hopping

I used a screen capture for this post.

Okay, so I just went on the "next blog" button wanting to visit some new blogs, and for some reason I have been dropped smack dab in the middle of a bunch of religious blogs.
Hhhhmm. I had no idea that the blogs on here were classed together. I ramble about everything, so shouldn't I have been hitting other sports blogs and movie blogs too? Things to make you wonder before the coffeemaker is even done yet.

I need a coffee.
I want a cocktail.
I need a personal assistant.
I want an interview with wrestler Chris Sabin is what I really want.

I hate waiting

Last night was the 3 hour special episode of TNA Impact. Live. Normally the show is taped.
If you have been reading my weekly reviews for the show on either my main blog or my http://blindtag.com then you know I don't have cable and have to wait for it to either be available on iTunes Canada for download or online on the official Spike Tv website. Neither has it up yet. Everyone else has seen it, reviewed it, commented on it, and knows what's going on but me.
Which makes me feel really out of the loop.
I know you are thinking, it's just a show, but I've been doing my weekly review posts on it for nearly 5 years on every blog I have ever worked on or for. To me, it's more then a show, it's more then a hobby (blogging about it) it's my one weekly thing that connects me to people.
I feel lost today because I'm behind everyone else with this. Feels weird.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

And over here

I started a new series of posts on one of my other sites for Sex and the City fans. Sort of.
I had been doing a series of posts for the last few years off and on, on my main blog that had to do with things from Sex and the City that I was finding similar to my own life and using that writing style to explain it all.
They were fairly well received so I thought I would try it up again on one of my newer blogs. This time, going with the question theme that Carrie in the show always used. "I had to wonder"
I know I have too many blogs, and starting to wish I had not made one for every thing I am into. But, it made sense at the time, as my wrestling readers did not like all the vampire stuff and my Jane Austen readers did not want all the wrestling stuff and you get the idea.
Well anyway you can check them out here The new series. There is only one intro and one full post so far as I only started them back up this week.
The ones I have been doing for the last 3 years are here

Saturday, January 2, 2010

This is frealed

I used a screen capture for this post.

On my wrestling blog http://blindtag.com
I have a business partner. I cover TNA wrestling she covers WWE wrestling.
Only, she not only hasn't written anything this week, and the two weeks before she just copied the score results from the official site, she keeps changing her name on there which is confusing to me and our normal readers. I see what is going to happen, she's going to stop writing. It's already started to show that she is loosing interest. Maybe she saw just how many people are really interested in TNA.
The big "return of the Monday Night Wars" is this week coming up on Jan 4th 2010.
I wonder how my team will fair.
If you have been reading my Gonzo Journalism blog then you know I did a break down last month of how I feel the two companies stack up. Check it out here let me know what you think.

Friday, January 1, 2010

My Best of Series

On my vampire blog I have done a small series I was simply calling the "best of". (Best of the Bug Eaters, Best of the Sequels, Best of the Hunters) I had not done a Best of Dracula yet. I am starting to think it is time.


You might remember my Best of series from 2007, (Best of the Bugeaters, Best of the Sequels, Best of the Hunters) Well, it's time for a Best of Dracula.

You would have thought this one would have been the easiest. Um no. Even though there have been hundreds of actors to play Dracula over the decades, there is less then a handful that people actually respond to.


The top four are also the most famous.

Gary Oldman

Bela Lugosi

Frank Langella

Sir Christopher Lee


What was it about each actor that made his portrayal of the count stand out in our minds?

Is it the balance they seem to bring to the character, half animalistic half man? Or is it the fact they all played him slightly damaged?
Each actor gave Dracula their own spin, some focused on the fact he was partially based on the real Prince of Wallachia, while some focused on the fact he was not human at all.

Each of the four actors who have made Dracula a household name did so at different points in the last 70 years. Each being the defining draconic icon for their generation.

Lugosi and Langella each made him irresistible.
Lee and Oldman each made him brutal.

4 different actors, 4 very different decades, 4 larger then life versions of the same man.

How do I manage that every time?

My apartment is not that big. I live alone and I do not lend out my stuff, so how is it I keep loosing my books?

I spent three months this summer looking for what I did with my copy of Frankenstein, and it ended up having fallen behind a bookcase. Now, I can't find my copy of Bridget Jones's Diary 2 Edge of Reason.
I have looked everywhere and still can't seem to find it. But hey, I managed to find my copy of the Vampire Journals DVD. I was looking for that too for the last month.